I’ve been spending more time on Twitter lately than I have any other social media platform. There doesn’t seem to be nearly as much bullshit there as compared to Facebook (And at this point, I’m not even on Facebook). And what there is, it’s easier to tune it out. I’ve recently been reading the material of a Dr. Ralph Napolitano. You can follow him here: http://www.twitter.com/drralphnap
He posted a thread today about boosting confidence, and the way this is written makes perfect sense to me. I’m reposting it in one page here (as opposed to many thread pages on Twitter). Let me know what you think, and if this helps you.
In this day and age, approval-seeking behavior is self-sabotaging.
Trying to impress others is a waste of time and minimizes your importance, individuality and authenticity.
1. Give your opinion, even if it makes you uncomfortable.
Start with smaller things.
Why you think it will rain.
Why you like baseball over football.
Why you didn’t like the movie everyone likes.
Don’t be afraid to state your opinion.
2. Avoid Judging Others.
If you’re overly critical of others, it’s only natural that you assume others are the same towards you.
By avoiding this type of behavior, you’ll drop the assumption that everyone else is judging you.
Allow others to be as they are.
It makes life more interesting.
Sit back and enjoy the differences.
Notice your thoughts.
Are you constantly judging others in a variety of situations?
You’ll fear the judgements of others if you continue to be judgmental.
3. Realize That Disapproval Can Be Used As A Weapon.
Many people use disapproval as a means of getting what they want.
They may disapprove of your opinion, clothing, hairstyle, or anything else to enjoy the fruits of your submission.
Call people on their disapproval of you.
Ask them to explain themselves.
Remember that most negative people are looking for a victim, not a fight.
When you stick up for yourself, many of the bullies disappear.
4. Be aware Of What Happens When Someone Disapproves Of You.
We seem to be born with an intense desire to fit in.
But what actually happens when someone disapproves of you?
The sky doesn’t fall on top of you.
You might suffer anxiety or embarrassment, but it passes.
5. Do Something For Yourself.
If you’re constantly seeking approval, you’re not taking care of yourself.
Show yourself that you’re important by focusing some of your time and energy on yourself.
It might be a little bit uncomfortable or selfish.
So what? Do it!
6. Fill Your Life With Things That Are Important.
If you had to run acrss the street naked to save your child’s life, you wouldn’t be worried about anyone’s opinion.
That’s because your child’s life is more important than your ego.
Being overly concerned about the opinions of others is damaging your confidence.
Each time you seek approval, you’re diminishing your own importance.
You’re causing yourself pain.
Your opinion matters, not theirs.